peasquared

life in pictures and words

Surprises on the Inside

Last Christmas I put my sewing machine to work and made a few of the gifts we gave. These are the ones I made for my bro-m and sil-s.

I found this fabric at Joann Fabric & Crafts. I still hadn’t started topstitching yet so this one doesn’t have it. Funny story about this particular zipper bag. I thought it’d be cool to have the zipper super close to the bag so while sewing upcloseandpersonal I accidentally sewed over the zipper! I had to break out my seam ripper and start all over. It was no bueno! But in the end I was happy that I kept with it and cleaned it up.
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(photo courtesy of sil-s)

I found this awesomely old skool cassette tape pattern on fabricworm and knew I had found the right pattern for my bro-m. His zipper bag is the first that I topstitched the zipper.
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(photo courtesy of sil-s)

When I cut his material I accidentally cut the lining too short so I had to cut just a few more inches of another piece and then sew them together. Oops!
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Now, for the surprises on the inside….I had seen this super cute embroidery patten and decided that I wanted to make it on something and give it to my sil-s. I thought how fun would it be to open a zipper bag and see this!? So I cut out my liner and then embroidered this cute little coffee cup. Now whenever sil-s opens up her bag she’ll see this little guy!
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(photo courtesy of sil-s)

I was perusing around mollie’s blog, looking at free patterns and such, and found this little guy. So I decided to give him a shot and embroider it into bro-m’s bag.

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Here are some “in the process” shots…
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I think they turned out great and I am so excited to try out some more.

photos edited with instagram, pixlr express, and photogrid Android apps

{homemade} garlic bread

When Paul and I were dating sometimes his mom would make spaghetti and have garlic bread as a side. And being the loving wife that I am I would make heat up some Texas toast whenever I would make spaghetti. But a few years ago Paul suggested we make our own garlic bread. So I read the ingredients of a few garlic spreads and came up with my own version. And it turned out great! Now we make or own garlic bread and put as much, or as little, butter garlic as we want.
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Start with some softened butter in a bowl, and add 1/2 tsp of each basil, oregano, and Italian seasoning, and 3 garlic cloves as much minced/crushed garlic as your little heart desires. I also add some salt and pepper too.
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Mmm…I love me some garlic!
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Mix it all together and put it on a little container until you’re ready to use it.
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If you’ve made it a few days in advance make sure to take it out of the fridge to give it enough time to soften. I’ve forgotten a few times and had to nuke it. It just doesn’t taste the same.
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Get some good French bread, or any bread you’d like, and spread that butter like it’s no one’s business.
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I butter both the top and bottom with just a little a while lot more on top.
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Bake it in a preheated-350°F-oven for about 15-20 minutes. Then let cool for about 5 minutes and slice and serve.
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Hope you enjoy!

edited with instagram

Instaproject

I’ve made a few personalized tumblers in my day but just never for myself. One day while shopping at target (of course) I saw a “personalize it” tumbler and thought I should make one with some instagram photos. I mean, what else to do with my instagram photos? Plus I had just learned about this instagram print site called printstagr.am.
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I ended up not going with the Starbucks one and found this Aladdin one that I liked better.
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I started by tracing the template onto some black paper and cutting it out.
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Make sure when you’re making yours to leave enough space at the bottom so your pictures/design doesn’t get cut off. Which is what this mark is for, even though you can barely see anything.
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I started with the bigger pictures first using photo adhesives so they don’t warp over time.
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Then I placed it in the tumbler so I could get a feel for what it was going to look like and also to make sure I liked it. *sidenote: I had a hard time getting it back into the tumbler because the photos were so stiff. So be careful when inserting.
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Next I placed the smaller sticker photos.
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My mom has this awesome machine that can “cold laminate” as well as turn regular paper into stickers. So to make sure that my design didn’t get wet when washing I “cold laminated” that baby.
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This is my design. Some of my favorite photos.
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A close-up so you can see the laminate.
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The first time I used it was at Teavana for some iced tea. Yum! But these days I use it for my iced latte.
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photos edited with instagram, pixlr express, and photogrid Android app

Zipper with a Twist

So my cousin had asked me too make a zipper bag for her A LONG TIME AGO and after about five months I finally made it for her.

I followed this tutorial by noodlehead. It was pretty straightforwardand fun to make.

I like to have the zipper opening from left to right so I’m always having to check and double check to make sure I’m sewing the correct sides together.image

I made a few zipper bags for Christmas last year and didn’t topstitch the zippers which I regret. So now I topstitch to give it a cleaner look.
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Once I’ve finished sewing and topstitching the zipper I line up the outside and inside together. Well, the outsides together and the insides together. Also, making sure that I’ve kept the zipper at least halfway open and about three inches unsewn (is that a word? Haha it is now!), that way I can pull it inside out to make it right side out. See that little piece sticking out in the bottom right picture? That’s a little twist to just a plain ol zipper bag that you’ll see in a minute.
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Here’s what it looks like sewn all around (with the little unsewn gap).
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So the top left photo is showing why I leave the zipper open a bit as well as why I need that gap. The top right is a detail of how the corners need to be clipped. But not too far that it cuts into the corner of the bag. Bottom left is what the bag looks like while turning it inside out. And the bottom right is after I’ve turned out and used my pointer to make a clean point in the corner.
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So this is what the liner looks like once it’s been turned inside out. I folded the flaps under and closed it by sewing it shut. Haha! Don’t get it? It’s nothing really just my weird sense of humor. Sorry. So anyways that last photo is after I’ve pushed the liner back into the bag.
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And that little twist is this pull tab thing in the side of the bag.
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Here it is all done.
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This was probably my eighth zipper bag and third one with the topstitching. I’m getting better at it but it’s still not super professional or anything. Practice, practice, practice! Still having lots of fun so that’s good too! Haha!

life. sucks. but I’m still here.

I thought that I would write a huge long story about what’s been going on in my life but it turns out that I’m not the writer that i so long to be.  If you’re still reading, haha..umm..I mean waiting because I haven’t written anything in forever, you could probably tell by now that I am not good at writing anyways.  I basically write how I talk.  Which is not very proper.  But who wants proper anyways?

So the title of this post directly corresponds to exactly how I am feeling at this very minute. 

Exactly one year, to the date, we suffered another miscarriage.

We had just landed in California, excited to tell our families, when we got the news that our second pregnancy would “most likely” end in a miscarriage.  We held onto some hope that maybe the doctors were wrong and we’d get to see this pregnancy to full term.  So we told our families. And within a few days of sharing our good news, we ended up having only bad news.

This time around we were more prepared and I think it made a difference.  I was able to, sort of, mentally prepare myself for what was about to happen, and for the most part knew what to “look” for.

But it still doesn’t make losing another child any easier.

This time around I didn’t let us talk about names, talk about how/where we would set up the room, talk about what we were going to do about my working, talk about saying “hi” to the baby. I didn’t want to talk about anything. I didn’t want to get my hopes up. I didn’t want to feel that crushing mental and emotional pain I felt last time. But I did anyway. I still do.

When customers come in asking about the maternity section, I work at Old Navy, I get a knot in my stomach and I just want to yell at them for asking me.  How can you stand there and ask me such questions looking all excited and happy when I just lost my baby. But they don’t know, it’s not their fault. So I help them.

When I see my coworker who is pregnant I just want her to stay away from me. I hate her. It’s not her fault but I hate her anyway. Because she still has her baby and I don’t. But she doesn’t know so I talk to her.

When I think about video chatting with a friend who is pregnant all I want to do is not see her. Ever. I don’t want to talk to her or hear about how she’s doing. It hurts too much. So I asked if we could only communicate via text. And I know I’ve hurt her feelings and I know she understands. But I can’t help but feel sad and hurt and then I can’t help but feel guilty for hurting her.

But I need to heal too. And this is not something that can be rushed.  I know that now.  I need to take the time that I need to heal my body. And my heart. I want so desperately to be done. To be free of this emotional pain. To be rid of these feelings.  All the excitement that comes with being pregnant, gone. In an instant. All the people that I was just waiting for time to go by so that I could finally share this wonderful news, can no longer share. In an instant. All the planning we did for when the baby gets here, no longer needed. In an instant.

Life. Sucks.

We lost our baby. In an instant.  (Well,  not really. It actually was about three – four hours.)  And who knows how long it will take to recover. I don’t think I even emotionally recovered from the last one.  And this one is just as hard.

Life. Sucks.

But I’m still here. I’m still going to work. I’m still getting up and doing things even though I just want to lay in bed and wallow in my pain. I’m still smiling and finding joy in things.

It’s hard and life sucks but I’m still here.

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